ABOUT ME

When I was in the 7th grade, a student I hardly knew approached me in the bathroom and asked if she could tell me a secret.

She said, “I am pregnant.” I didn’t know what to do. I asked, “Why did you choose to tell me?”

She said she’d noticed that instead of hanging out in one of the cliques, I moved around and had friends in many groups. So, she thought she could trust me. This made me realize that I was on to something.

Since then, I have oriented myself as the person to ask and inquire. From kids I took on two-week river canoeing trips to kids at my college, where I was a resident assistant, I became the primary resource.

At my college dorm, I even had a hanging therapy chair. Here is a picture of me taking it for a spin.

Even at department stores, strangers ask me if they should buy a particular skirt or where the jewelry department is located.

I have been blessed with an unbelievable intuition and uncanny empathic abilities. So, rather than betting on horse races or football games, my greatest satisfaction comes from seeing those Aha moments when someone gets it and makes a meaningful connection.

I love those Aha moments! I love when someone I care about gets it!

My master purpose is to be a divine lightning rod…

…that invites, invokes, and inspires others to truly believe that they are loved. I want them to know that they are enough and that they are more than they take themselves to be.

How does that translate to you?

I already know that you are enough. You are lovable, and you are more than you have been able to realize and see for yourself. You say, “Riiiight!”

Let me explain…

I’m a movie and live theater enthusiast. Surely, you’ve watched the Wizard of Oz. Correct?

Come on a journey with me for a moment.

As you may remember, for the bulk of the movie, Dorothy is excited and nervous in the land of Oz. She doesn’t know what to expect, so her senses are heightened, much like when we first embark on something new (e.g., school, learning how to drive, or therapy).

When Dorothy and her friends finally meet the great and powerful Oz, they are petrified. His image is big and scary with lots of fire and smoke around him, and his voice is so loud and frightening that they can hardly utter their wishes.

They are told they must kill the Wicked Witch in exchange for granting their requests.

The group is terrified! But they are more terrified of not getting their wishes. Dorothy wants to see her relatives again. So, they succeeded. They broke through their immense fear and killed the Wicked Witch.

They succeeded because their burning desire overcame their fear. This also happens in therapy sessions. In the end our desire outweighs the consequences of staying put, small, or frozen.

After Dorothy and her friends return to Oz with the witch’s broom as proof, Oz denies Dorothy and her friend’s requests. He says to come back tomorrow. Dorothy is crushed and angry, and wants to immediately go home.

Imagine for a moment that Oz is like your own inner critic. He or she asks you to do something, and chances are you usually do it. The actual reward, however, is that you need to do something more.

No reward! No prize! Just more orders! Sucks, right? Welcome to your life!

No wonder it is so hard to change. You’ve been listening to this inner critic your whole life, and it is comprised of a compilation of messages you have received from multiple people.

Negative impressions left by these people in your life are like an ugly inner tattoo.

How do we ever combat this inner voice?

Let’s get back to the story.

After Dorothy shouts that she wants to go home today and challenges Oz, he threatens her by saying, “Don’t arouse the wrath!”

Dorothy counters with, “If you were really great and powerful, you’d keep your promises!” Oz is not susceptible to guilt. He has no conscience. Instead, Oz says, “You ungrateful creatures!”

Think about this for a second. Who is the ungrateful one here? OZ is shouting that Dorothy and her friends are ungrateful, but Oz is the truly ungrateful individual. They killed the witch for him, but he shows no gratitude. How twisted is that?

Just as Oz makes his statement, Dorothy’s dog, Toto, pulls back the curtain and reveals Oz’s true self. He is merely human and a big bully! Oz attempts to maintain the lie by protesting. After all, he has built an entire city where the community fears him and does what he says.

Dorothy now has her Aha moment. “I don’t believe you… you are a very bad man!”

Dorothy came to realize that Oz represents that inner critic in all of us. This critic’s agenda is to keep us small, scared, and feeling powerless.

Can you relate?

Think about all the times you asserted yourself, felt confident, and were beginning to change. Out of the blue someone insulted you, stomped on your dream, or made fun of you. A common phrase is “Who do you think YOU are?” We absorbed the shame even though THEY are the jealous and envious ones.

We are hardwired to ALWAYS choose connection over growth. We stay connected to negative people, because we don’t want to feel lonely or face the unknown.

Since childhood, we have been conditioned and imprinted to accept awful messages. We don’t want to be forced to choose between self-love and a crappy connection.

Those people that cut us down aren’t bad people. They are just hurt and scared people. They believe what has been said about them, and they are spreading the same fake news to all who will listen.

They are afraid that you are going to set boundaries, refuse to buy their bulls**t, and leave them. Remember, they don’t want to feel alone either. They are invested in keeping you small, scared, and powerless.

Let’s get back to the story.

Remember at the end when Glinda, the good witch, returns and says to Dorothy that she’s always had the power to go back to Kansas (home, herself, her true nature).

The scarecrow quips back at Glinda by saying, “Why didn’t you tell her before?” Glinda replies that it was because Dorothy wouldn’t have believed her. She had to learn it for herself.

Amazing! We must learn it for ourselves. If someone else told us, we wouldn’t believe them. Hmmm, she might be onto something.

When asked what exactly Dorothy has learned, she says to her friends and to us, “That it wasn’t enough to want to see Uncle Henry and Auntie Em. it’s that – if I ever go looking for my heart’s desire again, I won’t look any further than my own backyard. Because if it isn’t there, I never really lost it to begin with.”

We are NEVER really lost.

It is not enough just to feel better, to be fit, to be a great spouse and parent, to make money, to have an impact, and to be self-assured and confident. That’s all nice and good, but it seems more like a New Year’s resolution than wanting real change.

For permanent and lasting change, we need to do whatever it takes to find our heart’s desire and act on it. And so, here we are in the Wonderful Wizard of Oz. I invite you to role play along with me.

In this scene, you are Dorothy, and I am Glinda, the good witch. [I must say I LOVE a good wand!]

Throughout this iconic movie, you are meeting and making friends with the Scarecrow, the Tin Man, and the Cowardly Lion. Each ‘friend’ is missing an important part, a heart, a brain, and courage, the latter sometimes also known as our gut or intuition.

At the close of the movie, Dorothy connects with all three of her “Centers,” her gut, heart and head. This connection makes her whole and able to seek her heart’s desire. And with that certain knowing, she returns to Kansas (i.e., herself).

While I am no Glinda, I can offer you some wise counsel and invite you to find the parts of yourself that are over-functioning as a coping strategy. Together, we can dig deep to access your courage to find the places where you have been avoiding or shutting off entirely.

Like Glinda, my aim is to help you reconnect back to the place of your true nature. This place existed prior to influences that your parents, the community, and society exacted on you. Come back now to Kansas!

What I’m really offering to you is to follow the Yellow Brick Road.

You KNEW by now that was coming. Right? Oh, how I do love a good metaphor!

Seriously, you are in charge. It is your journey. I’m on my own journey.

Glinda wasn’t jumping to second guess Dorothy, but she was keeping tabs and ensuring that Dorothy was on the path.

Remember the scene with the poppies? They could see the land of Oz in their sights, and yet their inner critic (this time the Wicked Witch) found a way for Dorothy to fall asleep right before the breakthrough happened.

Even her friends couldn’t wake her or carry her. She had to wake up herself!

How many times in your life have your trusted friends warned you about doing something that is not in your highest or best interests? Do you ever listen? It all depends, doesn’t it? Sometimes you listen to your inner critic and sometimes to your wiser self.

Dorothy had fallen asleep from the spell put on her by the Wicked Witch (her inner critic). It seemed as if Dorothy would never get to the Emerald City.

But wait! Do you remember what happens next? Glinda (her higher self) finds a way to counter the evil spell. It starts to snow, and the snowflakes nullify the curse, awaking Dorothy just in time to reach her goal of seeing the Wizard.

I bet you can think of dozens of times in your life when you ‘fell asleep’ or choked right before succeeding.

That pesky Inner Critic again! It’s like a bad mosquito that you can’t ever seem to kill. It shows up just when we take steps to grow.

Do you know that you have an extremely wise inner self? When invited or called upon, like Glinda, your higher self (like a Glinda) allows you to see above all the antics of your own inner critic and those horrible messages in the poppies.

So how do we grow when dealing with the Inner Critic, and how can I invite my Higher Self to run the show?

Together, you and I embark on our own Wonderful World of Oz.

During this adventure, we uncover and discover your strengths and healthy coping strategies as well as the people in your life that stick by you. Who are the scarecrows, tin men, and lions in your life?

Conversely, we begin uncovering the inner critic’s messages that you have picked up and embraced. They could be as simple as “I’m so stupid” when you drop your car keys. They may be more elaborate such as, “You trying to be too big for your britches.” This occurs when you are trying to better yourself and someone else is threatened.

This all sounds so good. What do I do now?

Simply put, you call or write me a note below to schedule a free hour-long consultation.

Okay, what if I want to know more about you and exactly how you do this?

The WHAT of how we move ahead to calm your inner voice and let go of those false messages can be found on my Personal Growth/Therapy and my Enneagram page.

The HOW we do it together can be found on my Specialties under Neuro Emotional Technique (NET) page.

The WHO of my credentials and qualifications can be found on my FAQ page.

The WHO of some other people like you that I’ve helped already can be read on my Testimonials page.

The WHERE and the WHEN of the logistics of how we meet (in person, over video or on the phone) can also be found on my Teletherapy and FAQ page.

Why do I do this?

I am here to fulfill my Divine Purpose. I have spent most of my life believing on some level that I was not enough and that I was certainly not truly lovable (or only lovable if I continued to do something worthy for others to keep EARNING that love).

I also really believed that the OZ in my head was really God. Who as a little kid listening to all those sermons can really question the pastor and God?

I found Neuro Emotional Technique (NET) in the 1990s. The details of my story are on the NET page. It’s a good read. Check it out!

I realized that we could biochemically and physiologically change our thoughts and our responses to stressful events.

In 2010, I became reacquainted with Enneagram of Personality, and I really began to take a deep look at my own Inner Critic, my defensive mechanisms, and my default patterned responses to stress. I found my mentors or Glindas, and I started attending deep, awakening retreats.

These retreats taught me how to unlearn negative patterns and to cultivate deep presence. My good witch showed up more often. And guess what? Things started bothering me less. Other people’s antics were their antics, not mine.

I stopped obsessing about that irritating mosquito. It was so freeing!

As I continue to stay on my own yellow brick road, I am thrilled to say that I have more Glindas in my life than ever. I still receive NET treatments and practice cultivating presence in my life each day. Some days are rewarding; and others are painful, grueling, and depressing.

This is what it is like when you choose to be an awake human.

I assure you that if you tap into your burning desire, move forward despite feelings of fear and guilt, and stay with it, you WILL make it.

Let’s embark on this journey together. YOU are loved. YOU are enough. YOU are more than you take yourself to be.

Glinda knows it, Toto knows it, and I know it.

Are YOU ready to know it?

What are you waiting for?

The time is Now. Call or leave me a message in the box below!