How I Work with You
I’m not telling you it is going to be easy;
I’m telling you it’s going to be worth it.
~Anonymous
It’s like the first day in a new school…
Beginning something you have never experienced before can elicit so many emotions. Often we feel nervousness, anxiety, or fear – but we can also experience a feeling of excitement and anticipation.
Many years ago, one of my mentors, Dr. Scott Walker, introduced me to this emotion called “frightfully overjoyed.” It is when you know you need to move forward and have the “butterflies in your stomach” feeling AND are still nervous and anxious.
Examples of this might be giving a speech or giving birth, participating in the ceremony of your wedding, or making a decision to trust someone like me to partner with you in your journey toward new insight, real vulnerability, personal growth, and discovering the real you.
I know the risks involved. I have been in this place myself when I have realized that I cannot do this transformational work alone, even with all my own training. I need someone to help me steer my own ship in an intentional, meaningful way, too.
Without a skilled and trained professional, we can only steer our ship to places we have already been. That has gotten us here, but it will not get us where we ultimately need to go.
I am here to partner with you on this journey
One of the main reasons I have offered a free hour-long consultation is so I can begin to sense where new potential clients are in their journey, where they may like to go, and whether we might be a good fit for each other.
Throughout most of my career, clients have found me because their friends, colleagues, or family members have personally shared their own sacred journeys that they have experienced with me. Their loved ones have learned to become more vulnerable and authentic and want the same for them, too.
By the time these clients dial the phone, they have been encouraged to call me (sometimes multiple times) to see if I could help them.
This webpage is a more detailed overview of how you and I would begin working together to address your concerns and your blocks to a more fulfilling life.
It all starts with you
You are welcome to read every word of this website, including all of the Testimonials and the Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ). That is a great way to find out more about me and my philosophy. It also lets you have a peek into some of the other people like you who have made the leap for themselves, and they have thrived because of it.
Eventually, however, YOU have to leap, feel the feeling of frightfully overjoyed, and contact me anyway.
Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it.
Go out and get busy.
~Dale Carnegie, bestselling author
Contact me by calling me now or filling out my contact page below at the bottom of this page.
Setting up a phone session
Once you contact me, I will respond promptly by calling you to set up a time to talk by phone or on Zoom meeting.
When we set up a time by phone or Zoom, I will ask for your email address, so I can send you some initial paperwork for you to complete. I will ask you questions about yourself, as well as have you circle some physical symptoms you may be experiencing. I would ask that you scan these sheets into your computer and email them back to me before our initial appointment.
This is very helpful for me to begin to get a glimpse into your life and prepare for our consultation.
We begin talking to each other
I will call you at our designated time, and we will begin with me asking you several questions about yourself and your current life, and also leave time to discuss any other questions you may have.
If at the end of our session we both decide we are a match and would like to progress ahead, I will suggest a frequency of care, and we will schedule additional sessions.
THE FUN BEGINS!
Here is some information on how I see integrative health and wellness, and a bit about the road map I use to help get you there.
As I also mentioned in my Individual Therapy page, Abraham Maslow developed this amazing philosophy called the Hierarchy of Needs.
It is essential to find out which level of the pyramid you are most struggling with, so I can determine how best to help you.
How do we know where to begin?
I developed this 9 Dimensional wellness wheel from Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs and the three instincts we have as humans to feel seen, connected, and safe.
Let’s look at these zones further.
Our preserving needs
The Green Zone is about the areas in our lives that assist us in feeling safe and secure.
Let’s call this zone our Preserving needs. Here are some examples:
You may be living in a dicey neighborhood or near a noisy highway or don’t have access to filtered water.(Environmental)
You may be underemployed or have a great income but are still spending more than you are making. (Financial)
You might have a chronic health challenge, don’t exercise, or eat poorly. (Physical)
These preserving areas, directly and indirectly, affect the rest of your overall wellness and well-being.
Our navigating needs
The Blue Zone is all about belonging and contributing to your family and society.
Let’s call the blue areas our Navigating needs.
Here are some examples:
If you feel that you are disconnected or feel left out or excluded by others in some way… (Emotional)
You may feel that ‘I don’t have what it takes’ or ‘There is something wrong with me’ that prevents you from feeling comfortable with others in social settings like work or school. (Interpersonal)
You may feel like you are not expressing your contributions to your family or community in some meaningful way or to find others with which to share your gifts. (Social)
If these scenarios sound familiar, you likely need to address them to find a balance in your overall wellness.
Transmitting needs
The Red Zone is all about creating, manifesting, and making our mark on the world.
Let’s call them Transmitting needs. Here are some examples:
If you are either afraid or shameful or have previous trauma around embracing your sexual needs… (Sexual)
You find that you tend to lose yourself and/or your own identity when you are with others. (Psychological)
You may intentionally stop yourself from ‘putting yourself out there’ to take risks, manifest, and find your growth edge. (Mental)
If these examples sound like you, you likely need to address and resolve these areas before you can have what you may truly want and need. Without manifesting and transmitting needs, it is difficult for us ever to believe that we are worthy of great success.
Whatever you are not changing,
you are choosing.
~Laurie Buchanan, Author
Everyone struggles with these areas of wellness.
We usually tend to struggle with one zone more than with the other two. The most challenging zone is commonly called our blind spot.
Our blind spot is our deepest source of Shame.
Because it is our blind spot and we DO NOT want to deal with it, we tend to either hide it, deny it, ignore it, or mask it. Sometimes we make fun of others who seem to excel in the same area we feel like we are failing. We can also experience jealousy or envy toward the other people who ‘seem to have it all together.’
Remember the term ‘hurting people hurt people’? This is the classic case of the bully or the mean girl that needs to overcompensate because of their own inadequacies.
None of this behavior is pretty.
Pretending our blind spot doesn’t exist just makes it worse.
We are in a culture that wants everything to speed up, not examine our surroundings, or be present to what is happening around us. We want our take-out food, our Amazon order, AND our existential answers NOW. We are bombarded with ways to override our feelings and mask our true selves.
Every time we cope in this way, we are either focusing on the future or ruminating about the past.
We are not present in our experience now.
In my view, our best chance of living our lives in the present is actually to face our lives.
We can either wade in slowly or dive in with a splash and get wet with the emotional events we’ve been too uncomfortable to face. Until now.
“The best way is always through.”
~Robert Frost, Poet
Come on in and join me… the water is fine!
I am inviting you to come explore with me the ways you are not showing up in your life, and we can figure out together what you may need to do to get that life you desire. If we want to manifest and create an epic life, we will need to give up our comfort zone.
Change and our comfort zone are just not compatible with each other.
Let us start with your strengths
When we begin, I want to spend time sussing out your strengths and what is going well in your life. I want to know who is in your inner circle, who adds to your life, and who you can go to for support.
I want to know about your spirituality and whom you lean on when you are struggling? What activities and practices do you do that are healthy and assist you?
What are your past and present struggles?
I also want to know what you struggle with and how it shows up in your life. I want to hear how it sinks in and affects you, how it dulls your spirit, and what you have done that has either worked or not worked to address it.
If there is something that has happened to you in the past that you feel is still affecting you and how you move about the world, I want to know that, too. I will hold your experiences delicately and gingerly; sometimes, I am the first person with whom you have shared about your experience, and I will already know your bravery in sharing your secret.
What are your dreams and wishes?
Lastly, let us not leave out the fun stuff!
I want to know what you wish for and what you yearn for in your life. What dreams and desires do you want to connect back to that are possible and worth doing whatever it will take to get there?
What do you want to be true in your life? I want to know all of those wishes!
These are big questions and big answers
It all begins with our therapeutic relationship.
Although I am a therapist, guide, and coach, I am also a wife, daughter, sister, aunt, and friend. I live in the regular world, too. I know how to steer you through this work and make it tangible and realistic for your life.
I want to partner with you to enable you to identify the limiting beliefs that have held you back, collaborate together to design a personal intervention growth plan, and strategize how to execute in practical terms a personal vision for your life.
How you get results
I am in private practice to help overwhelmed and unfulfilled busy professionals like you discover and experience real purpose, fulfillment, and meaning on their own terms by specializing in transformative mind-body therapies addressing our brains on three levels:
- calming down our fearful fight and flight brain,
- resolving our emotional “inner voice” brain of limiting beliefs and suppressed emotions, and
- clarifying and amplifying our thinking brain, charting a clear path to true freedom that happens when we are fully here and in the flow of sharing our divine gifts with the world.
I possess all of the essential and indispensable therapeutic techniques of a regular psychotherapist and marriage and family therapist combined with a powerful and scientifically sound mind-body technique (Neuro Emotional Technique-NET) that neutralizes your limiting beliefs about money and love, as well as a dynamic personality system (The Enneagram) that can pinpoint your unique life lens complete with your strengths and challenges.
Here is a visual diagram that illustrates my three sectors of educational training and focus, and my three areas of concentration and specialty work. When we employ all of these areas and interventions, we have the best chance of reaching the apex and believing that you do have what it takes to create your amazing life.
This 3-prong approach nearly ensures that you will stop settling, ask for what you need, and have more real joy that you can almost ever remember!
I offer a free, no-risk, one-hour consultation to get to know each other.
The only risk is not taking one. Call or message me below.
I look forward to meeting you!